Who used all the
Wi-Fi?
Ah, apartment life.
Bad Wi-Fi, mystery laundry piles, and a roommate who says, I'll Venmo you.
Maybe 2027 deserves an upgrade.
Coming August 2027, Four Lakes Properties introduces the brand new Union Station Apartments, furnished in-unit washer and dryer.
Internet included a great central downtown location, one to five bedroom apartments, and no double occupancy fees.
That's less adulting and more actually enjoying where you live.
Union Station Apartments, now leasing from Four Lakes Properties.
Wait, we have a washer and dryer in the apartment?
Hey,
it's Waters from the Waters Wake Up Call.
Hope you're having a fantastic weekend, and I had a really fun week this week.
Friday morning, we were celebrating No Brainer Day with No Brainers.
That's a no brainer.
Alright.
So I work in a tax office.
Okay.
And I hear at least five times, 10 times a day, when are my taxes due?
Yeah, it's not quite as obvious as when is the 4th of July.
But still, April 15th should be ingrained in your brain.
Exactly.
April 15th has been tax day for years.
Right.
It got a little kind of wonky over the pandemic and things like that.
Maybe that confused some people.
For some people, it really doesn't take a whole lot to confuse them.
I don't know if you've noticed this.
Common sense went out the window.
Long time ago.
It seems like absolutely.
But it seems like fewer and fewer and fewer people have common sense.
So it's kind of like nonsense is the new common sense.
Well, our generation I think is
the last generation that knows how to do anything.
Preach, baby, preach!
And once again, the example here, those people coming up to you asking, when are my taxes due?
No brainers.
At least five to 10 times a day.
When are my taxes due?
Yeah, do you say that's a no brainer?
No.
Hey, ooh, ooh.
taxes do.
You should say December 1st.
That'll show him.
Let him pay the penalty.
Screw him.
Screw him.
That's a no-brainer.
Screw him.
Yep, exactly.
Exactly.
I'm sorry.
You'll have to fill out a 1040-HZ and then you'll find out.
So here you go.
Here's a document.
You should make a special document for them.
Fill this out and then come
back.
Z is homestead for Wisconsin,
so note that won't work.
I'm just picking two random letters, you know?
Even with the EZ form, people still don't quite get it.
There has been no EZ form for years.
Oh really?
See, that's how good I am.
I've never used it.
So I wouldn't know.
Exactly.
Yeah, I'm too smart to know that the easy form is gone.
Leave it to the professionals that do taxes.
Don't be doing them yourself.
Don't be an H&R blockhead.
Exactly.
Hey, I-
I am H&R Block.
Are ya?
I'm a manager
at H&R Block.
Alright, well you watch out for them H&R Blockheads.
And you guys have to be busy so there are extra Blockheads coming up to you, right?
You gotta be busy by this time of season.
Seven days a week since January.
That's gotta be taxing.
It is very taxing.
Littrelay.
Litt, yep.
Part intended.
Hey, it's the old whiner.
Hello there, old whiner.
How's old whine and old whine?
How's the old whine old whine?
wine are doing?
Have you been drinking some ol' wine?
No, I'm going to work.
So I wouldn't be drinking any wine.
Well, I'm not saying right now as you're driving.
That would be dumb.
That's a no brainer that that should not be done while driving.
Yes, but I have something.
Mr. Obvious, you remember those commercials on the radio?
The Captain
Obvious?
They're captain, obviously.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Well, anyway, that's kind of like a no-brainer.
Right?
I mean, common sense isn't that common anymore.
No.
You
know, and you wonder how they even get out of bed in the morning and get dressed and, you know...
The
people with no common sense with no brains?
Yes, exactly.
Right.
I mean, you see it every day.
I don't have a legitimate example, but...
Oh, we can come up with so many.
Some stickers you find on items in your home will state some no-brainers.
Like, make sure you don't pound the little teeny-weeny nail with the biggest mallet you have.
Or don't try and cut wrapping paper with an ax.
Why they had to write...
Well,
you know there's an idiot.
You know there's a person with no brains out there that probably injured themselves and sued them and now they gotta write a label.
I know that's happened with I think McDonald's and Wendy's at least.
People spilled the coffee on themselves and they got burned, of course, and they sued
them.
Yeah.
I'd say we take all warning labels off and let natural selection kind of lead out the idiots.
I think so too.
And we've been
dumbed down in our society and...
and they have to explain everything that should be obvious.
You've heard of the Darwin Awards, right?
The natural selection.
The thinning of the herd.
But the Darwin Awards are when somebody dies from such an idiotic way that it gets a Darwin Award.
Make sure you don't use toaster in bathtub while you're cleaning yourself.
You know, that kind of thing.
Well, my radio is well late for my bathtub, so I don't have
to work out.
Good.
Good.
Yeah, if you keep it on.
the bathroom sink, that's great.
But don't keep it on or in the tub while you're in it.
Right, exactly.
Yeah, that's a no brainer.
Thank you, Mr.
Captain Obvious.
Yes.
Thank you, Admiral Obvious.
You'll be Admiral Obvious Captain.
Okay, sounds good.
Okay.
Thank you, Mike, and you always break my day.
Good morning, Mike.
Good morning to you, Sah.
I'll bet you got a good no-brainer, don't you?
I've got a no-brainer song.
Ooh, and what is this particular tune?
From some Canadians, they sang a song something about working for a weekend.
That is a no-brainer.
Yeah!
Everybody is working for the weekend.
and if everybody's working for the weekend, obviously everybody knows that that's what you do.
You worked for the weekend.
I think that's brilliant, sir.
Brilliant.
You've got a song.
You can play.
Yeah.
Good morning,
Mike.
Beekeeper here.
Beekeeper.
How are you, Beekeeper?
Oh, just buzzing away.
What's
the buzz, Beekeeper?
Think about this one for a moment.
Even
though I'm German, how about this for a no-brainer?
What day is Cinco de Mayo?
It's always on the third Thursday of March.
What am I wrong?
Okay.
Oh gosh darn it.
I am wrong.
Why do you say because you're German because you're German you wouldn't know Spanish and you wouldn't know Cinco de Mayo or?
That's a possibility.
Okay.
Although I did
have somebody ask me some years ago.
This one day is Cinco de Mayo.
Yeah.
And I don't know.
It's either 5th of May or warning, don't eat the mayo.
It's been into Cinco all night long and you'll probably get sick.
It's even worse if you say, uh, what day is the 4th of July on?
Well,
exactly.
That
really you should know.
Cinco de Mayo or 4th of July.
But I think that's, I think you're right.
No brainer.
Yeah.
There's no buzzin' in that brain whatsoever, beekeeper.
That's for sure.
Thank you
for
picking up and have a great day.
This is the man with the pickle to put the laugh in the tickle.
It's the one and two three man calling this morning.
Well, what do you know?
You sound crazy, so I'm glad you're calling.
Well, that's good.
Do you have anything on the list of no-brainers you would like to share, Mr. Pickleman?
Always.
Make sure you have
toilet paper before you
sit down.
If you break that rule, your brain is probably in what you're sitting down on.
Right.
Especially if a storm's coming.
Hopefully you've gone to the store and you've gotten plenty of toilet paper along with the milk and the bread and the stuff.
Yeah, Sam's Club.
Sam's Club or Costco, get the bulk toilet paper because you never know when a storm's a coming.
Or the shelves will be empty, correct?
No brainer, no brainer.
Pickleman.
Good morning, Mike.
Good morning, Iron Man.
How are you, sunshine?
Oh,
I thought you were a no-brainer.
No-brainer?
Like, what would you give me as a no-brainer?
Not good to give your animals chocolate.
No, it sure isn't.
That could kill the animals.
If
you want your animal to be healthy, you don't give them crap.
Don't put that stuff in your own body.
Don't put it in their body.
Yeah, and
you know, a lot of us went to parties when we were younger.
And again, when we were much younger and some things illegal were being smoked and some of the people they had a cat or a dog would blow the smoke.
in the animal's face, and I thought that was about as cruel a thing as you could possibly do.
Oh,
yes.
It's like, oh, watching my cat get high.
Right.
God knows what they're thinking.
They're probably just terrified.
They have no idea what's going on.
Killing your cat.
They're depending on you to keep them safe, and you shouldn't be doing anything that does any harm to them whatsoever.
No, me and my wife go down there and...
donate our time and it's just some of the stuff that we see is just unreal.
Where do you donate your time?
Down at the animal shelter in Tama.
Okay, that's awesome man.
I'm perplexed.
Are you going to play any music to accompany your theme today?
Well, I think we could find probably some no-brainer tunes.
Don't see the computer.
I don't know if anybody covers the topic.
That's gonna be top ten.
Well, there's chain of fools.
Won't get fooled again.
There's what a fool believes.
Yeah, won't get fooled again.
Yeah.
I think I'm
wrong by the who.
Play that.
That's got a beat to it and a positive.
You know what?
I think if we made everything idiot-proof and made everything no-brainers, people wouldn't get fooled again.
Yeah, but there's people in power that wouldn't like that.
They like having a
pool of stupidity out there, Mr. Waters.
Oh, I know.
I know.
They like to keep us dumb so they can pull stuff on us.
And we go, oh, what happened there?
Yeah, then they just point the finger blame of whoever's standing next to him.
You know how the drill goes.
Hey, this has to do with the burn band for today.
And, you know, it actually kind of fits the no-brainer situation.
But what is the difference between a hippo and a zippo?
A hippo and a zippo.
One's lighter, one's heavier.
Yeah, one's about two times, and the other one's a little lighter.
I like the way you said it better.
I was just guessing, but that's a good one right there.
Yeah, they really shouldn't be doing any kind of... So yeah, no welding, I wouldn't even solder outside TV.
No, definitely not.
Weekday mornings, 5.30 to
10.
