Waters here from the Waters Wake Up Call.
Here we are one week away from Christmas Eve, and I thought, hey, let's talk about the worst Christmas songs ever for our Tunes Day topic.
I am so tired of Mariah Carey's song, all I want for Christmas is you.
I'm just so tired of it.
It's a nice little tune once or twice, but then, after hearing it a trillion times, you want to take that song and Mariah Carey and bring it to the lowest floor of your house, that's probably
basement and you'll want to even dig a hole beneath your basement.
I'd say eight feet deep and that's where you'll want to put the song and Mariah Carey and just be done with it.
You want to put it right there.
And then maybe that's not deep enough.
Yeah maybe you should get a bigger shovel.
Or you get one of those big construction things that... A backhoe?
Yeah, a backhoe!
A back-ho-ho-ho!
Good morning!
Well, good morning, Iron Man!
How are ya?
He's doing fine, he's doing fine, man.
Good, so what's up?
You got a worst Christmas song?
I was gonna say, Blue Christmas.
You hate Blue Christmas?
Yeah.
Is it the way he sings it, or is it the song?
I don't know.
Who wants a Blue Christmas?
Well, nobody does.
Elvis doesn't either, but his girl left.
Now he'll have a blue Christmas without her.
Or a...
It almost sounds like he's got indigestion sometimes.
Maybe he'll have a blue Christmas because all of the Christmas food, and after his fourth peanut butter nanner sandwich, he's, you know, bad case indigestion.
That'll give you a blue Christmas.
Or he's about to sneeze.
It's either indigestion or cold, I don't know.
What
is it about last Christmas you don't like?
I
don't know.
What?
This could be your last Christmas?
Yeah, but he says last Christmas I gave you my heart.
Not I ripped your heart out of your chest with my bare hand.
There's a difference there, Iron Man.
But anyway, it's
Last
Christmas and Blue Christmas.
Yeah.
You want a happy this Christmas, not a blue last Christmas.
That's right.
I think we now have Iron Man figured out Christmas holiday wise.
I want a happy Christmas.
I understand.
You've made your point.
So anybody who plays Last Christmas, you'll wham, knock them in the head.
Yep.
OK, well, I guess I'm not playing that song
today.
That
now is officially my favorite Christmas song.
Was that Bingle
Gels?
Is that what you're talking about?
Yeah, we were all drunk up and saying that one time about 40 years ago.
If I ain't
mistaken, this is Buzz, ain't it?
Yeah, you got it.
Hey, thanks for the prize yesterday.
I heard I won on the way to the VA.
The worst
toy, the lingerie won, yeah.
Pretty good story there, Buzz.
You got some pretty good stuff when you call.
Oh, I got a bunch of them.
I'm sure you do.
You know, I wonder if there is a version of that bingle gels somewhere.
I'm going to look for it.
OK.
The problem that I don't like is I want a hippopotamus for Christmas.
Oh, I couldn't agree with you more.
I can't stand that either.
Who wants a hippopotamus for Christmas?
That is one of the dumbest songs.
You think the kids talking about the hungry, hungry hippo
That's what I think.
And I
hear that all the time, you know, as many people hate that song, there's always a few weirdos who think it's, oh, it's great.
So, you know what they say about opinions.
It's like the hole in your back end, you know, everybody's got one.
They there must be some who like grandma got run over by a reindeer
One of my all-time favorites talking about bad ones, but I cannot stop thinking about one of my favorites is the Dominique the donkey Oh a lot of people hate that song.
Oh, I do too That's one of my favorite Christmas songs.
I love that song I I annoy my kids and my family with that song every year.
I love that song
If
I heard those two songs back to back, I would throw up through the entirety of both songs.
Just play them on a repeat.
I wish Dominic the Donkey was run over by a reindeer.
There you go.
Put those
two together.
Play them
on top of each other.
Yes, sir.
I'm going to give you two terrible Christmas songs.
Well, anyway, number one, Far and Away, is by Oink Henderson and the Squealers.
In other words,
Porky Pig, and he sings Blue Christmas.
You hate that?
I think that's
hilarious.
I think it's hilarious.
My wife just hates it.
I'll tell you one that I got sick of.
I'll give the runner up to Grandma God Run Over By Her Reindeer.
I think you need to switch those.
That's what I think.
I'd much rather hear Porky Pig than Elmo and Patsy.
Yeah, you know what?
That's probably true.
I'm going to nominate
I'm gonna hope that you play it.
You know, I have already played it this morning.
Oh gosh, I missed it.
Well, I'm gonna play it again.
This is an excuse now to play it again.
And you know, maybe Porky Pig got run over by a reindeer.
If
Dominic the Donkey can get run over by Reindeer, I think Porky can as well.
We'll just have all the rotten songs get run over by a different rotten Christmas song.
So Porky will get run over and then we'll all have ham for Christmas.
Everybody had ham for Christmas.
Yes.
Yes.
All right, man.
We'll all get some... What was his name in the squealers?
Oh,
the sexy Santa song, sure.
So not a big fan of those Christmas classics then?
Well, you can't be more clear than that.
What is it about Santa Baby you don't like?
Is it the fact that there's some woman coming on to Santa Claus?
You know, you wonder who's singing the song.
Is it Mrs. Claus?
Is it, uh, you know, the nanny?
Is it, I don't know.
It
just goes on and on, doesn't it?
It's so
repetitive.
It's a very redundant Christmas song.
Yeah,
even the Bob and Doug
version.
That's bad.
Oh, now that hurt.
The Bob and Doug thing, that hurts a little bit.
I can listen to that, but I flip it off if it's the real 12 days of Christmas.
Yeah, I can't even tell you what all the 12 days are.
No, but I saw it on Facebook the other night.
Waterloo was doing it.
That was okay, because I didn't have to hear the words.
I just watched them.
Oh, we never heard of
it.
Okay.
Merry Texas Christmas, you all.
Merry Texas Christmas, you all.
Who sings it?
Texas Ritter, I
think.
Oh.
You
know, that's John Ritter's dad, Dex Ritter.
Well,
fine, you know, I'm just trying to give you an interesting piece of information.
That's all I'm trying to do.
Oh,
the sexy Santa song, sure.
So not a big fan of those Christmas classics
then?
Well,
you can't be more clear than that.
What is it about Santa baby?
You don't like is it the fact that there's some woman coming on to Santa Claus?
You know you wonder who's singing the song is it mrs. Claus is it you know the nanny is it I don't know Weekday mornings 5 30 to
