Hey, America has a birthday on Thursday as if you didn't know.
Great.
Just what the average American needs.
Another reason to eat cake.
The Chevy Corvette just turned 71, which means it's now old enough to date a car that's 30 years younger.
Baywatch star Pamela Anderson turns 57.
Today, now when she runs in slow motion, she's actually going as fast as she can.
Today is National Financial Freedom Day, or as people working on radio know it, Monday.
The Supreme Court ruled that cities can ban people sleeping in public.
And you can find the ruling by Googling the people versus Gary
is paying SpaceX $843 million to crash land the International Space Station into the Pacific Ocean.
A much cheaper way, just FYI, to make the space station crash would have been to hire Boeing's maintenance crew.
Prince Charles has released a new portrait of himself in full military regalia.
It's to commemorate his lifelong battle against poor people.
Did you know, did you know, and this is again an FYI, each dollar bill contains 3,000 kinds of bacteria?
Oh, I'm sorry, did I say dollar bill?
Sorry, I meant each Kardashian.
Walgreens is closing a significant number of stores.
All right, guess we'll just have to go to CVS, said shoplifters.
Kevin Costner, you know what he says?
He says he makes movies for men, and not just any men, based on theaters showing his new movie Horizon, Invisible Man.
In a scene for the upcoming season of Only Murders in the Building, Molly Shannon tharts in Meryl Streep's face.
And FYI, Meryl is already nominated for an Emmy for the way she crinkled her nose and waved her hand in front of it.
like Meryl Streep.
Yeah.
Top female golfer, Nelly Corda, withdrew from a tournament because of a dog bite.
And you could tell which arm it was because she had a hole in one.
OK.
Thanks for the dad laugh.
Appreciate it.
And finally, the Lakers drafted LeBron James' 19-year-old son.
And when asked why, they replied, because LeBron told us to.
Of course.
That's
