Hit and Run Headlines 3-11-2024

So we lost an hour yesterday for if you actually watched the Oscars I mean if you forgot about the Oscars don't worry by now.

It's probably only about half over Yeah, and you can tell the Academy Awards were last night.

LA is completely out of ozempic And did you know the Oscars are 96 years old now almost old enough to run for president

Oppenheimer won seven Oscars and Jimmy Kimmel also paid tribute to it by just totally bombing.

Danny DeVito awarded best visual effects to the team from Godzilla minus one who carried miniature dinosaurs or as Danny DeVito described them, regular sized dinosaurs.

That's a short joke Danny John Cena went on stage naked Unfortunately, this means Meryl Streep must now do the same thing at WrestleMania No, thanks American fiction was shot in just 26 days Not to be confused with killers of the flower moon, which actually runs 26 days

So there's a new documentary about Stormy Daniels.

I don't know if you heard the tagline is 75% less porn than poor things.

Have you seen?

It's it is it's kind of like a sequel to Franken Hooker not that I've ever seen Franken Hooker I never have I never have but it was Should have been called that Travis Kelsey traveled to Singapore to see Taylor Swift perform

and also to be the tallest person in the country by, like, four feet.

Mike Tyson will fight Jake Paul on Netflix in July.

And I don't know who's gonna win, but I already know the loser, us, the world.

That's who.

Aaron Rodgers wants to play for the Jets another four seasons.

By this point, even President Biden is like, retire already, will you, will you?

You're too old.

Today is National Napping Day, as well as National Dream Day.

And if you feel the need to get some shut-eye, just fire up last night's Oscars and spend the next three hours watching self-important celebrities tell you exactly what you should think.

Exactly what you should think.

George Santos is running for Congress again.

He said he's enjoyed his time away from Congress.

winning Olympic gold medals and curing cancer.

But it's time to return to doing the people's business, right George?

The people's business.

The Vegas airport is testing out self-service TSA screenings which is great news for people who want to get through the line faster and terrible news for people who like being groped by strangers.

Boeing says they can't find records of work done on a panel that broke off an Alaska Airlines flight.

Though, in their defense, that's only because the records blew out the door of a mid-flight 737 MAX.

Researchers say energy drink consumption by children and teens can cause a heightened risk of anxiety and depression.

Not surprisingly, energy drink companies say the research is nothing but a load of red bull.

And musical anedonia is a neurological condition characterized by an inability to derive pleasure from listening to music.

In other words, these people feel exactly like we do when we hear music by Justin Bieber.

That's right, I said it Bieber.

That's

all I got.