Transcript
The Waters Wake Up Call with Mike Waters · Wed Feb 21, 2024
Hey, has this ever happened to you?
You're just going on the air and you have to take a potty break.
Has that ever happened to you?
And it just comes on suddenly, right when you're going on the air.
All I can tell you is I should probably get this done pretty quickly.
And I'm doing the, I have to potty dance while I'm doing the hit and runs, okay?
Just so you can get the full picture.
Capital One is buying Discover.
The consolidation means Charlie Sheen will have one less credit card to use for cocaine.
You know the FDA has approved the first drug to treat severe food allergies That means we're getting ever closer to a future where bullies will have to do more research to find the weak ones because usually I think they found the the Allergy ones and they went to town.
I don't know people are returning their Apple vision pros because they're causing headaches
How awesome would the world be if we could do the same thing, but with children?
Oh, I'm kidding.
I'm half kidding.
Little Caesars is testing selling pizza by the yard.
They're a target demographic, by the way, as people who measure their waste by the yard.
A California woman was caught stealing thousands of dollars in gum.
She tried to hide from police by sticking herself underneath a chair.
That makes sense.
That's just logical.
Astronomers have identified what is believed to be the most luminous object in the universe.
The teeth of Donnie and Marie.
Chickens prefer attractive humans to less attractive ones.
But their absolute favorite kind of humans are attractive
Scientists have discovered the fastest-growing black hole ever.
They found it in the top-left quadrant of Vladimir Putin's chest.
Historians have discovered a decimal point being used as far back as the mid-15th century.
It was invented by a man who wanted to brag about the size of his, shall we say,
Burlington, Vermont has been named the biggest slacker city in America.
When asked for comment, residents replied, whatever.
Russell Crowe revealed he broke both legs while filming Robin Hood.
Nowadays, the only legs Russell Crowe damages are turkey.
Billy Baldwin turned 61 today.
And sadly, Billy's mother died in 2022, so he no longer gets her sweet birthday message of, wait, which one are you?
Alex Van Halen will release his memoir later this year.
It's called, I Was In The Band 2, You Know.
I
I think that was it.
I'm paraphrasing.
J.Lo says her new album is inspired by Ben Affleck.
That's not a compliment.
The album title is, Sad Donut
fell during a concert in Seattle.
Even sadder, she tripped over her cone bra.
Director Sam Mendes is making separate movies about each of the four Beatles.
The Paul movie will start as an inspirational drama then turn to dark tragedy when he forms wings.
Madame Webb has received the lowest Rotten Tomatoes score of any superhero movie in the last ten years.
Even Shazam was like, sucks to be you.
Alright, that's all I
