Hey, it's waters from the waters wake up call had a blast this morning celebrating random acts of poetry and get funky day
To Mike waters on the airwaves.
He's kind of lucky me playing all that poetry music with all his fans
being funky.
I love that.
Listen to it being funky and poetry.
Yeah.
It's all going on today.
Yeah.
No, that's awesome.
Thank you for that.
And I also have something more.
She always has those funky t-shirts that you get to wear.
You know what I'm wearing today?
Not sure yet.
Care Bears.
Oh.
My
shirt says born to sparkle and shine
Yeah,
I think that's a a Steppenwolf song born to sparkle and shine
I
think I turned into a chicken there.
That's the funky chicken
It's your blue, sky blue water.
Eastern Iowa loves you.
Oh, that's nice.
I really love the funkiness of it.
What can I say, you funky white boy?
Funky chicken.
Cool, Michael.
It's me, Sharpie.
How funky is Sharpie today on a scale of 1 to funky 10?
I'm feeling mad at funky.
See that one more time.
We were speaking when I was speaking and I don't hear well with cacophony.
Ooh, cacophony, good word.
Very funky word, cacophony.
Kaka Funke.
That's what we'll call it from now on.
I like that.
Thank you.
I'm thinking about random poetry and funk today.
Wow, do you have a random act of funky poetry?
I wish I did.
What do you have?
The area to try to reach Aberwock.
Yes, of course.
It's a load of nonsense.
It totally is.
Yeah.
And that's what makes it so totally funky.
Yes.
Do you know any of the Jabbawocky, the Jabbawock?
Yeah.
Hey, that was I think the sequel, wasn't it?
Because that was
nonsense.
It just goes like that.
Do you want some poetry?
I would love some poetry, D-Man.
Are you a poet and don't know it?
Uh, I know I'm not.
Hey, that doesn't even rhyme.
But I'm still anxious to hear your bad poetry.
I love rock and roll.
Jesus performs miracles.
The Vikings are winning the Super Bowl.
Is that an incorrect haiku?
I have no idea.
I don't know either.
I think it's three lines.
The first line has certain syllables and then the second and then the third.
So I don't know either.
Let's call that a possible haiku.
There we go.
I wrote this on play to work this morning.
Oh, let's hear
it.
The days are getting short and the temperatures have begun to fall.
So don't be sad.
This is the best season of them all.
You have football and harvest and hunting with friends.
Water's on the radio with topics that never ends.
So enjoy the day of Mr. Deeds.
I may not be, but I am the big man on KOKZ.
Right on.
Very nice, big man.
And in layman's terms, I guess they call that a bull
s***.
Yes, they do.
But
it's a clever kind of bull pooping.
Let's say.
Since my mom, I don't know about yours.
My mom's not a dollar store mom.
That's why I use the
clean language.
I could remember if you could say that word on the radio or not.
No, my classy mother taught me that you couldn't.
My mom used to do this once.
She said, I love myself.
I think I'm grand.
I go to the park and hold my hand.
I put my arm around my waist.
And when I get fresh, I slap my face.
I love that!
Say that one more
time, I didn't quite catch the first
part.
They go beep, beep, beep down Sesame Street.
Dang, that's funky.
You got a greasy granny with a hole in her panty and a big behind like Frankenstein.
She go beep, beep, beep down Sesame Street.
That's it right there.
Well, they don't call me the funky junkie for nothing, man.
You funky monkey.
You have a big day, Mr. Water.
I was enjoying your Saturday night.
I'm just as God made me, you know?
Right on, brother.
Yeah, my poem is, walk your dog, kick your cat, trailer trucking.
Where is that?
You know, I love that.
Other than the kick of your cat, you're a mean man.
But other than
that,
I liked it.
You can't knock the
cat
on a funky,
funky day.
Walking
your dog is fine.
Mary and Mack dressed in black, silver buttons up and down her back.
How oh, miss her toe.
She broke her needle now.
She can't sew walking the dog.
I'm
just a walk in the dog.
Well, if you don't know how to do it, I'll show you how to walk your dog.
Hey, baby, we got the Wolfman, yeah.
Ah, yeah, nobody more funky than the Wolfman.
I hear you only come back on National Funky Day, because you are a funky, funky man.
Well, I got a little bit of poetry for you.
The Wolfman special, don't you know?
Lay it on
us.
Time one, perfect thing, baby.
You got the curves.
You know the second part and I got the
angles.
Weekday mornings, 5.30 to
10.
27% of Americans say they'd be okay with politicians getting policy ideas from artificial intelligence Well, you might you might disagree, but I agree.
I mean they've used their natural stupidity.
I think long enough.
Let's see how this goes
The new chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff is named Charlie Brown.
That's right, Charlie Brown.
It's an appropriate name since he reports to Mr. Magoo.
A lock of George Washington's hair is on sale for $45,000 or for just a few thousand more you can purchase an entire Supreme Court justice.
And, you know, Washington was the father of the country until Nick Cannon started impregnating everybody.
Smoke is blanketing parts of the Northeast, not from Canadian wildfires, from all those new iPhone 15s overheating.
The McRib will be back next month.
Sadly, the same can't be said for many McRib fans.
Be careful out there.
Today is Virus Appreciation Day.
I guess the inspiration for Virus Appreciation Day was a gas station bathroom, so.
An alarm will go off on everyone's phone tomorrow at 2.20 p.m.
Eastern time.
Damn it, you two.
What are you guys up to this time?
Tell me.
A Florida woman has been arrested after hitting her daughter with a frozen chicken.
In her defense, she has a unique method of tenderizing her meat.
It wasn't about being mad at her mother.
An Oklahoma woman was hit and killed by a plane while mowing her lawn.
Well, it's her own fault for letting it get that high in the first place.
Miley Cyrus is wearing her hair dark.
She looks so unrecognizable that Billy Ray stopped hitting her up for money.
Ma'am Bialik wants to bring Blossom back, but as a drama, not as a sitcom.
If she really wants to try drama, she should just do a show about how they wouldn't let her host Jeopardy unless she was with a sidekick guy.
That's what they should do.
Gwen Stefani turns 54 today, which explains her new song, Hollaback Soccer Mom.
And finally, today is the first day of the Major League Baseball Playoffs, or as the Yankees call it, Dancing with the Stars Night.
Yeah.
Well, that's all I got.
