Morning Meltdown: Lessons Mother Taught Me

Hey, who's ready for Mother's Day?

As well as the water's wake up call morning meld down for a Friday morning.

First of all, I'd like to sarcastically thank my least favorite mother.

That'd be Mother Nature for all the wet weather for Mother's Day weekend.

You know, you'd think she'd be a little more considerate on a weekend such as this.

Oh, by...

I whacked my cowbell.

Sorry, Iron Man.

We'll hear more from the cowbell a little bit later on, okay?

Alright, I know.

We need more cowbell.

I know Christopher Walken is listening online.

You know me and Christopher Walken went to kindergarten together.

Big kindergarten buddies.

We did snack time together.

But anyway, what was I saying?

Wet weather for Mother's Day.

Yeah, thanks a lot.

Oh, well, what are you going to do?

Maybe somebody should give Mother Nature a Snickers.

But you know, Friday morning, we were celebrating mom by talking about the one lesson we were most thankful she taught us.

So that'll be coming up a little bit later on.

We'll talk

and a

Coming up on the Water's Wake Up Call Morning Meltdown, my daily podcast, always up here at 1057KOKZ.com.

But you know first, as you should know by now, the Bright Side and a perfect Iowa story for Mother's Day weekend.

Let's look on the Bright Side with Mike Waters on 1057KOKZ.

Sponsored by Walton Collision Center.

And I don't know about you, but I sure like a good Iowa Bright Side.

Like Kyrie Jones, she was walking her dog near her home in Des Moines.

This was just earlier this week.

And she noticed a window screen on the ground outside a neighbor's home.

Well, then she notices a couple of other things on the ground and looked up to see the neighbor's two-year-old son's head poking out of a second floor window more than 10 feet above their concrete driveway.

So Jones, Kyrie Jones, who's 33 weeks pregnant, ran around to the front of the home and tried to alert the family by knocking on their door and ringing the doorbell, but no response.

So she called the Des Moines Police Department's non-emergency line to report her concern.

So when she walked back to check on the toddler, the toddler hanging from the window.

And Ms.

Jones says, I looked up and he was dangling from the window and he's trying to pull himself.

He was crying and I was screaming.

So a few seconds later, the boy fell from the second floor window.

But fortunately, Jones had positioned herself under him and managed to catch him.

Phew, right?

So Jones wrapped up the child and sat with him until police arrived, and that was just a few minutes later, thank goodness.

But the toddler sustained minor injuries, and Jones, who has two daughters of her own, is doing well apart from a few bruises.

But for her part, Jones believes she was just doing what anyone would do in her position, saying, if you see a baby in danger or a child, you're gonna help.

And here's this lady, pregnant, with two kids,

and sees a toddler hanging out the window she had to help.

And where were this toddler's parents?

I have no idea.

I have no idea.

But that's the question.

Where were they?

Thank goodness there was a good mother walking around the area and noticed this and became the hero.

So here's a big shout out to Kairi Jones, hero of the day from Des Moines, Iowa.

There is a bright side sponsored by Wong Collision Center on Highway 151 in Fairfax.

Wong Collision Center, where quality is their priority.

Where was the kid's parents?

That's what I want to know.

Well, thankfully, there was a mom who knew just what to do walking by.

And I'll tell you what, the hit and run headlines are on the way.

But first, though, I have a message for mom.

And now, mom thoughts.

My family took such good care of me when I was sick last weekend.

And I'm still doing the dishes to prove it.

This is Ben.

Mom thoughts

there you go mama.

Okay now.

Let's crash into this doctors perform surgery on the brain of a fetus You know fun fact fetus brain was also the New England Patriots nickname for Rob Gronkowski Police and mucle tail is that I said no idea mucle tail

So, Washington, it's Washington State.

They're looking for someone who stole a go-kart with a toilet mounted on it.

Cops say they have a lot of questions for the thief, but even more questions for the owner.

Hey, when you gotta go, you gotta go-kart.

Moving on, Sunday is Mother's Day, so show mom some love by taking her out for a nice dinner.

Or if you're not that crazy about her, take her to Applebee's.

The World Health Organization has declared that Monkeypox is no longer a global health emergency.

Yay!

Now people can go back to just worrying about A, COVID, B, bird flu, or C, Taylor Swift mania.

John Travolta and Catherine Heigl will star in a romantic comedy.

It's called Who the Hell Greenlit This.

Shania Twain is on a liquid diet to lose weight.

It's kind of affecting her songwriting.

Her latest hit is Man, I Feel Like a Milkshake.

The Academy of Country Music Awards aired last night.

I don't know if you caught it.

I certainly didn't, but performers included Carly Pearce, Trisha Yearwood, Hardy, and Kid Rock, who just shot some Budalak cans and stomped off a stage.

Emilio Estevez turned 61 today.

He's celebrating by drinking enough champagne that he forgets he's related to Charlie Sheen.

He turns 42 today.

He's celebrating by continuing to creep everyone out with his terrifying thousand-yard stare.

And finally, my favorite harmonica player and yours from the Jay Giles band.

You know him, you love him.

His name, Magic Dick.

He turns 78 tomorrow.

And you really don't hear that name anymore unless someone's talking about Pete Davidson or Nick Cannon.

You know what's like my mother always said, make sure to put on a clean pair of underwear just in case you get into an accident.

Truly a great lesson.

You know, another lesson I learned came from Carol Brady.

Don't play ball in the house, or else you break her favorite vase, then glue it back together with cheap crap that leaks the second she puts water in it.

Hey, and you know, while we're on the subject, how about some more lessons from Mom before we get into the five things you didn't know you needed to hear?

Hello?

Respect.

Respect.

Oh, that's

kind of mean when I was a child and I'd play with other kids and family.

I'd do a little meet with their toys and stuff and mom would get mad at me and I'd get smacked on my hands and everything and

she'd

say, you know better than that.

Right.

And you gotta respect their toys, respect them, learn to play fair, learn to play right.

Learn to share.

Learn to share.

And I know, I know you have respect and to share and you prove that when you delivered the...

Cowbell to the studio.

You got a bunch of cowbells, you gave me one, and I still use it daily.

Iron man, still use it daily.

So I can tell she's taught you respect, because you really seem like a very respectful kind of a guy.

Well, thank you.

Thank you for the cowbell.

Maybe your mother taught you, you always have to have more cowbell.

Maybe your mom taught that to Christopher Walken, who taught it to the rest of us.

Rick, a lot of cowbell.

Yes.

That's very important to my mom.

Respect.

and more cowbell.

Thank you.

R-E-S-P-E-C-T.

Okay, how about five more lessons?

For me, you know, I can be a bit of a mother.

And now, the water's wake-up call with this morning's five things you didn't know you needed to hear.

So I was reading about this motorcycle, and this guy does not drink, but he decided to invent a beer-powered motorcycle.

Well, that makes sense.

Anybody who would drink would drink the beer, wouldn't use it for fuel.

But it does.

It literally runs on beer, and he thinks the bike could go up to 150 miles per hour.

And it isn't a big deal to waste the beer, because the guy just, like I say, doesn't drink.

But here's what he says about

it.

So this kind of expects something a little bit different from me that comes out of the shop.

One thing about this motorcycle is definitely different.

I don't drink, I'm a non-drinker, so I can't think of anything better than to use it for fuel.

Yeah, it can be any

kind of liquid, it can be rumble, it can be caribou coffee, it can be anything, but beer, why not?

We got it running,

we got it built.

And I think it looks

pretty cool.

I want one.

Cool, huh?

Second thing.

Police are now looking for a toilet go-kart thief.

So if you see a toilet go-kart thief anywhere in eastern Iowa.

911, I guess.

They stole a modified go-kart, this thief, that had a toilet as a seat.

That's the kind of, I think, vehicle you'd want to take to Taco Bell on Taco Tuesday, but a plumber used it.

This was the purpose as a parade float to promote his business.

So he said it's worth, like, two grand, and it's a one-of-a-kind vehicle, obviously.

But sadly, it sounds like the go-kart didn't make it in one piece.

Shattered porcelain.

found across the street so the plumber suspects that somebody may have tried to lift it into a vehicle and it just kind of snapped and broke so as far as we know the police don't have any suspects yet and now that the toilet is busted they have nothing to go on okay thing number three here's a dumb guy for you a guy in Tennessee got arrested after adding an extra ingredient to his girlfriend's salad while she wasn't looking

this is this is nasty business I just want to say she ended up taking herself to the ER and it's a darn good thing she did because it wasn't bacon bits nope nothing like that nothing you'd expect in the salad he eventually admitted he sprinkled a bunch of meth on her salad meth

She doesn't do drugs, but apparently he'd done meth the night before, so it sounds like he enjoyed the experience and thought she would too.

But thankfully she's okay, facing charges for domestic assault, reckless endangerment, like I say, nasty

business.

Let's talk about, let's talk about Dolly Parton.

Because Dolly we know last year got inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and there was this big thing where she didn't think she deserved to be in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.

She's a country artist.

So God bless you Dolly for that.

And she's not a poser.

Dolly is not a poser.

So she figured since she's in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame that she'd better put a rock album out.

You gotta love

Dolly.

These officers, couple of cops in Enid, Oklahoma, they were responding to a report that someone was screaming for help.

So here's what happened when they arrived.

Well,

if

it was a person, certainly got his goat, huh?

Well, I think that's five

things.

Five things, and then all things just seem a little bit better, eh?

Oh, hang on.

Phones are ringing.

Hello?

Years ago, I used to work at a radio station up in Minneapolis, and Dolly Parton visited the station.

I had the pleasure of being assigned as sort of her escort for her time there.

After she was there for about an hour, they're ready to go, and her security guy calls me over and says, OK, as we leave the building now, people know that she's here.

So I was a little concerned about her security.

so what we're gonna do is when we get off the elevator we're gonna have you go in front the two of us will go on the back and then the third guy he'll go behind her just to protect her in case somebody lunges at her with a knife

Okay, hold on a second.

So they put the radio guy in front and the security in the back.

About

halfway through I bailed on that idea and I said, why don't you guys go in front?

I'll go in the back.

There

you go.

I would have to think everybody knows that radio people aren't exactly great for security.

I mean, we run away.

So they figured, hey, this guy's stupid.

And I actually walked about halfway out there with the thinking down.

And all of a sudden I'm like, okay, I got to spot the guy with the knife for the gun.

And then I realized, like, wait a

second.

Thanks for the dolly story.

Okay, how about some more lessons from Ma before we wrap this sucka

up?

Mr. Water!

Sucka-tad!

How are you, trucker-tad?

What's going on today?

This Friday at the Mother's Day weekend, my friend.

Oh, hauling the feed to the piggies.

Hulling the feed to the piggies.

Mmm.

That must be pretty good feed if it turns into pork my friend Pork feed Yes, yes, yes, let's talk moms

truly blessed to still have mine around, you know, she's 92 years old

Yeah, you are blessed to have your mom around absolutely

comes up with her little things

her mom is

there you go

Yeah, like what give me give me a for instance or two

stop your crying or I'll give you something

Oh,

that's a classic right there.

So

what would she teach you?

Yeah,

I've said it before.

I'll say it again.

All you got is your word.

And if it's if it's a lying word even once people think, well, I'm not quite sure if he's lying or not.

So then what good are you?

Yeah,

a man has two things.

I can't say one thing on the radio, but I can say his word.

I think a man has two things.

His and his word.

Yeah, is there a song we can play for your 92 year old mother?

Is there something she likes?

Yes.

That's a good one.

Yes.

I'm going to see Willie in June, as a matter of fact.

Who happens to be 91 years old?

90.

He just turned 90.

Or 90.

That's it.

My parents had the Willie Nelson live album from the 70s.

It was like Willie and family or something.

It was a great live record, though.

That's the thing, my mom.

The trifecta of what my mother taught me.

There was the Beatles, Monty Python, and she taught me about the Willie.

Yes, Willie was a great guy.

Because you know, there are only two things.

has his willy and his word.

That's

right because they know they know instantly whether you're good vibe or bad vibe.

well those mothers sound like awesome ladies if your mother was a hamster i wouldn't know what to say other than your mother was a hamster hold on a second phone's ringing hello this is from the north country and

your father smells like elderberries

thank you very much yes your mother was a hamster and your father smelled like elderberries then there he don't you know

elderberries

You say funny things that some of us know the rest of the quote.

The Monty

Python.

That means you have a sense of humor is what that means.

Oh

yeah.

And then

they throw the mush all over the wall.

Yeah.

Maybe Mother's Day, but I had to add the rest of the quote about the elderberries.

Well, I'm using the mother was a hamster for Mother's Day and the fodders in the elderberries of her fodder stayed in there.

Hey, don't you know?

Yeah, that's right.

I was talking about that earlier and my mom was the one who turned me on to the Monty Python.

So I've always appreciated that.

But I won't tell you how it put my mother showed me.

Okay, well now

I'm just excited, so I'll look forward to that.

Thanks for that, it's always fun talking Monty Python.

Welp!

That's how Midwesterners wrap things up.

Well, that'll just about do it for the morning meltdown for a Friday.

Thanks for listening.

Have a great Mother's Day weekend, and I will catch you back here Monday morning.

Bye-bye.

Have fun storming the castle.

Bye-bye.

Every Monday through Friday, 5.30 to 10, right

here.