Transcript
The Waters Wake Up Call with Mike Waters · Fri Jan 13, 2023
Who used all the Wi-Fi?
Ah, apartment life.
Bad Wi-Fi, mystery laundry piles, and a roommate who says, I'll Venmo you.
Maybe 2027 deserves an upgrade.
Coming August 2027, Four Lakes Properties introduces the brand new Union Station Apartments, furnished in-unit washer and dryer.
Internet included a great central downtown location, one to five bedroom apartments, and no double occupancy fees.
That's less adulting and more actually enjoying where you live.
Union Station Apartments, now leasing from Four Lakes Properties.
Wait, we have a washer and dryer in the apartment?
Hey!
Hey, it's Mike Waters from the Waters Wake Up Call.
Welcome to the not great, but the best I had from last week podcast.
I hope you have it a great weekend.
And man, what a long week it was.
Did it feel long?
I think it was the first full week we had since the holidays, since Thanksgiving.
And it was just long.
I think that's the point I'm trying to make is it was a long week, you know?
I don't even remember Monday.
Monday's a blur.
So I think we should just skip along to Tuesday, because boy, do I remember
Remember, Tuesday, we were celebrating the 74th anniversary of the 45, and we're all gonna talk about our first 45s right after we check in with our sponsors so I can get paid.
Today's show is brought to you by Prostate Pals.
Your prostate health is so important to
us.
You
better never point at me.
I'll just, I'll leave it at that.
But I think we're all ready for Tuesday and talking about our first 45s.
How about you, start us off.
That was
one of the solutions that everybody would do is try and record the thing, whether
you... I
know, that annoying.
DJ talking over the song.
What are they thinking?
Shut up.
Don't talk over it.
You're ruining it.
Now I gotta wait till it comes on again.
Well, I'll tell you what, I will make you this promise.
I will play Popcorn by Hot Butter, and I will not talk over one second of it.
Okay.
All right.
Then I can
record
it.
Yeah, get your boombox out or whatever you got.
Oh.
Back then it was an eight track recorder.
Do you still have an eight track recorder?
Yes, I do.
That's cool.
Do you still have the Hot Butter 45?
I never found it.
You never found the
album.
How's the rest of the album?
Probably not worth the time.
I can remember here in Cedar Rapids there was a store called The Giant and right when you'd walk in there was that record stand you were talking about.
Yeah.
And it would have like the top 20 and you could go in and pick out your 45 that you had heard on the radio that got you so excited to buy that stuff.
Right.
And that's exactly how it was.
I thought it just brought back all those memories.
There is something about having to go out and search for the 45 and having that sense of I found it.
I found it.
I'm so excited.
I didn't you get it you're excited to bring it home and put it on the turntable whereas now it's like a big deal I just download that boom all right there I got it
I know but you're right it was the thrill of the victory
yeah the sense of discovery ah it's a beautiful thing it
really
was yeah there's none of that anymore none of that yeah boom there it is
There was just something so cool about exploring a record store and finding stuff.
Who knows what you'd find in there?
Well, look at it to calendar.
I think Tuesday leads us to Wandom Wednesday.
We were talking about lost skills.
First, we're going to do hit and run headlines, and we will do that right after this.
Today's show is brought to you by the tone of voice in your head.
You know what I'm talking about.
In your mind, when you're talking, you sound like this.
But in reality, your voice probably sounds more like this.
Take a breath and think before you spew.
He'll thank me later.
Every weekday morning at 6.50 I like to get you up and get you going with some hidden run headlines.
So
the U.S.
is going to be sending armored tanks to Ukraine to restore order.
Hello responded downtown Chicago.
What about us?
Inflation hit a seven decade high in Germany and Germans aren't worried.
If stuff gets too expensive they can just take it from France.
reversed a ban on life-sized sex dolls.
So you know what that means.
Time to book a trip to Seoul.
So today is stick to your New Year's resolution day.
Now unfortunately for most of us that ship sailed by about the third of January.
I'm sure you heard about this, the FAA grounded thousands of flights yesterday, some for several hours, due to a computer glitch.
Several hours though.
I mean, how long does it take to shut the system down and restart it?
I mean, come on.
I'm sure, I'm sure that's what the FAAIT told him to do.
I don't know.
Three people in Egypt were arrested for trying to steal an ancient statue of Ramses, the second.
Now, that's what I call a pyramid scheme.
Researchers say the best medicine for anxiety and depression is kindness.
In other words, find someone who's willing to share their pot with you.
Don't do drugs, kids.
So many hillside areas in LA are in danger of collapsing following powerful rainstorms, but still the most unstable thing in LA remains Kanye West.
Titanic is returning to theaters in 3D.
People who've seen previews say that the thing that really pops off the screen is James Cameron's ego.
And James Cameron said a studio executive once called him to pitch O.J.
Simpson for the Terminator, but it didn't go anywhere.
Thankfully, the role went to Arnold Schwarzenegger, who really only murders the English language.
Kim Kardashian posted her natural hair color on TikTok, because, you know, that's the part of Kim Kardashian's body we pay attention to, her hair.
random Wednesday lost skills is what we're talking about you know those things that we used to do we used to be able to do and they teach us because we had to know how to do them in order to function in the society but now because of technology or other factors well we just don't have those skills anymore and we're not teaching them anymore so they're lost you get it all right why don't you start us off
nobody knows how to drive a stick
No.
So do you have a stick shift?
My dad taught me how to drive on a semi at 15, but that's it.
That's young to be driving a semi.
How'd you do?
Good.
I'm 16 and still driving it.
All right.
So it was just last year?
Yeah.
Well, I'll bet as a 16 year old, there are a lot of things we used to do that you probably don't know how to do.
Have you ever dialed a rotary phone?
I have.
My neighbors are 90 and still have one.
Well, I guess if you have 90 year old neighbors, well, of course you're going to do that.
I'm sure they've
We got one of those little black and white televisions, too, with the antenna coming up.
I
don't even
think they have a
TV.
They don't have a TV?
No.
Maybe just a radio, and they're still waiting for Jack Benny to come on.
You probably don't even know what that means, do you?
I don't.
Oh, that's funny.
That's even before my time, so I don't know what the hell I'm talking about.
So, where are you currently buzzing there, Bumblebee?
Now, are you from Clear Lake?
I don't think you are.
Now, tell me the truth.
Is it really blue grass there?
Is that what you got?
And what color are your eyes?
Did you get punched?
You're getting a fight?
Right.
So Ken and
Tucky, what can I do for you?
Ah, cursive.
And I'll bet the kids think that it's called cursive because they're screaming profanities at their frustration of not being able to read it.
My teacher in elementary school even knew calligraphy.
That's how skillful she was.
I know.
Well, you keep feeling for her.
I don't think she's around anymore.
Well, I'll tell you what.
If I move it up with her, I'll give her your best.
Yeah, you do that.
You say water, says hi-ho, honey.
Thank you, Ken Turkey.
Hi-ho, Waters.
Well, thank you there, Bumblebee.
I appreciate you calling.
I appreciate you, my friend.
All right, but...
Coming up next, we're going to get into a little throwback Thursday and we were talking about if you could go back to your childhood growing up somewhere in the 70s or the 80s and relive one glorious moment, when would it be?
So we're going to talk about that.
First, we're going to do our five things you didn't know you needed to hear.
And we'll get into that right after a little payment from a sponsor, I do believe.
Today's show is brought to you by Dayquil, who reminds you of the time you accidentally took Nightquil.
and then figured out your mistake when you were halfway to work.
That was not
good.
The
Vikings beat the Bears yesterday.
I'm sorry.
I know.
I know there are a lot of Bears fans listening and in Eastern Iowa.
But come on, you know, the Bears haven't been playing all that well.
And I guess I expected it.
I didn't expect the Packer loss the week before.
But the Vikings, the Vikings win still was was good against the Bears.
The thing I'm really excited about and thank you Detroit Lions for doing this week what the Vikings couldn't do last week and beat the Packers and the Packers are not in the playoffs.
So Detroit, this is the only time I'm very thankful for you.
All right.
So enough about that.
Let's talk about this in Florida.
I don't know if I would ever take
a baby to a Florida football game.
The amount of alcohol they're drinking and everything else.
Well, I was reading about this Florida guy.
He's being accused of throwing a beer on a five month old baby, which is just dumb, buddy.
Dumb.
This was during a drunken rampage, of course.
But here's the mother of the child talking about the altercation.
As he stormed out, he proceeded to throw an entire beer.
on my five-month-old baby who was in her stroller doing absolutely nothing wrong.
My initial reaction was my fist clenched, and I was like, I'm gonna go after this son of a... And then I immediately...
was like, you know what, if he's crazy enough to turn around and do that.
When I saw my baby scared like I've never seen before soaking wet in beer, I knew I had to just pick her up and grab her.
Just pick her up and get her out of there.
It's Florida.
It's a football game with a lot of drunk guys.
So some sad news yesterday.
Adam Rich from Eight is Enough played Nicholas, the youngest kid of the Bradford family.
He passed away yesterday.
It was 54.
We don't know the cause of death yet.
Here's a little something from Nicholas when he saw a minor league baseball player.
Um, excuse me, but aren't you Meryl the Pearl?
Oh,
well,
some folks like to call me
that.
Well, I call you that, and I think you're the best pitcher in baseball.
Well, thanks, Sarah.
Nicholas.
Nicholas Bradford.
Can I have your autograph?
Sure, Nicholas.
Let's talk about 411.
Do you remember 411?
Information?
It turned into, hey, you want to give me the 411 on that thing going on tonight?
If only there was an easier and faster way to look up addresses and phone numbers nowadays.
Hmm.
Oh, what?
Information 411 is out.
Hey, can one of you Google what we're supposed to do?
And again, you know, I love going out singing, so let's go out singing.
I have a Quarantune here for you.
There's another new COVID variant.
This one's called XBB 1.5, and it's been a while.
But here's a little song for us to sing along.
A little something for our COVID times.
I coughed, I sneezed, I could not breathe.
What could this be?
I thought this COVID virus thing was true.
Those folks in China thought that it was too I'm fully vaccinated doing everything right So why am I infected with XBB 1.5 Quarantine and one more time XBB 1.5 I'm sick of all this job Yeah,
I think you're singing for all of us
Buddy, there you go.
I think that's five.
What the hell were those
things?
Five things you didn't know you needed to hear.
See, five things just enough, right?
And you didn't know you needed to hear that.
So that's kind of nice as well.
So that will move us right in to throwback Thursday.
And again, we were talking about if you could go back.
to one glorious moment of your youth growing up in the 70s or the 80s, where would you go?
I'd
go back to 74.
I was four years old, and I got my first record player.
It was one of those little play school things that you could just play 45s on.
And I remember getting my first 45 at four.
It was rubber ducky by Ernie.
And then I think three years later, I matured into disco duck.
Oh, yeah.
From Rubber Ducky to Disco Ducky.
And I think tomorrow is National Rubber Ducky Day.
That's appropriate.
I'll play Rubber Ducky into Disco Ducky.
How about that?
All right.
Hey, that's cool.
Yeah.
Little black crack.
Black
crack.
I wonder if anybody ever made a disco rubber ducky I wonder if that ever happened I don't know I'll have to Google that see what happened with that but anyway you know throwback Thursday leads us to the most glorious day of any week Friday although this past Friday was Friday the 13th so I know there are some superstitious people out there and some maybe not so superstitious people but we'll get into Friday the 13th and talk about that creepy topic
Right after we check in with my sugar daddy, I mean my sponsor.
Let's pay some bills.
Today's show is brought to you by people who don't return their shopping carts.
Continuing to be selfless champions of laziness and entitlement.
Oh, those people drive me crazy.
I hope those people have tons of bad luck, and it won't even have to be Friday the 13th.
All right, well, let's talk about Friday the 13th, which we just experienced.
So are you superstitious at all?
My car didn't start this morning, so I had to take my truck.
That's probably bad luck.
Well, you know, you were saying Friday the 13th coming in, I'm going, well, I'll tell you that my car didn't start.
It's probably my first encounter, but the day is not over.
No, no, the day is very young.
I forgot my phone at home, and you don't realize how important your phone is until you forget it somewhere.
I
think if your car broke down and you didn't ever fall.
Oh, that's what I'm afraid of.
I think your fear will be Sunday night when you find out.
You might not win.
Oh, man.
How could you say that to a Vikings fan right before a playoff game?
You know, you probably know how we feel about that kind of thing.
Thanks a lot for that.
Oh, good luck, you guys.
Hopefully they win.
I don't
care.
Mr. Water!
Well, trick!
You know who you calling me on Friday the 13th is semi-lucky I Haven't been able to talk to you for a while, so I haven't been able to make a really bad truck joke So
well me and the amazing ronder heading down to debut I get my stitches out today stitches
shoulder
stitches They're actually staple.
So did they have like one of those swing line red stapler?
I believe I believe I believe you have a
I was told I could listen to the radio it
reasonable volume.
I'm going to bring the building down.
Ron and I are wondering who the idiot was that ever came up with Friday the 13th as being a bad
day.
I think his name was Jason and he was a big hockey fan.
Thank you, Trucker Todd.
Thank you, everybody.
That's going to do it for the not great but best I had from last week.
And what comes after Friday?
Oh, Saturday, my day off.
So I'm going to go have a coffee and a ring.
ding ding and and uh oh I don't know what else pet my cat you go do something all right make yourself useful not too useful uh because then everybody will think you're gonna be that useful forever so pace yourself okay all right we'll catch you back here Monday morning 5 30 to 10 and uh weekday mornings 5 30 to
10
Who used all-
the Wi-Fi.
Ah, apartment life.
Bad Wi-Fi, mystery laundry piles, and a roommate who says, I'll Venmo you.
Maybe 2027 deserves an upgrade.
Coming August 2027, Four Lakes Properties introduces the brand new Union Station apartments.
Furnished, in-unit washer and dryer, internet included, a great central downtown location, one to five bedroom apartments, and no double occupancy fees.
That's less adulting and more actually enjoying where you live.
Union Station apartments, now leasing from Four Lakes Properties.
Wait, we have a washer and dryer in the apartment?
