It's Monday.
You've been kind of out of the loop.
Let's get you up to date on some things.
I took the headline.
Yeah, that made me hit and run this morning.
Those are joke headlines.
Oh, right.
So much crap going on.
And that's exactly what it is.
It's crap, man.
So Elon Musk, or as I like to call him, Ellen.
Ellen Musk says he wants to punch Kanye West.
Join the club, first of all, Ellen.
And Will Smith responded, my rate is $500 per hour.
So Chris Christie's niece bit law enforcement trying to remove her from a spirit flight.
So yeah, hunger kind of runs in that family.
New York City is looking to hire someone to handle its rat problem.
Applicants should have experience in pest control and urban management and be at least part cat if you possibly came.
Iran has abolished its morality police, and hopefully America will follow their lead soon.
So a study found that lifting weights is better for your heart than running.
I would have thought the opposite, but that's how it is, you know?
And I'll keep that in mind next time I don't do either of those.
I'm more of a walker myself.
December, this month, is National Impaired Driving Prevention Month.
So and I'll try to remember that as I'm racing home after downing a gallon of eggnog while my mother-in-law shares her thoughts on the unparalleled brilliance of Herschel Walker.
So I'll remember that.
The average car spends 95% of its life parked while the average Kia spends 100% of its time towed.
Axl Rose will no longer throw the microphone into the crowd after hitting a fan in the face.
It's the same reason Tommy Lee no longer unzips.
The Indiana Jones 5 trailer set a record over the weekend most watched trailer ever at AARP.com.
I know I watched it.
I know I did.
And I've been saying, you know, all right, all right, you know, today is Walt Disney's birthday.
I've been talking about that.
And here's a fun fact about Walt.
He had a secret apartment in Disneyland where he could work.
Or at least that's what he told Mrs. Disney.
All right, and finally, finally, the United States soccer team was eliminated from the World Cup after losing to the Netherlands.
I'm sad that we lost, but very happy that it will now be a hole four years before I have to pretend to care about soccer again.
Yay!
There you go, your hit runs.
I never saw him.
He's basically hitting me.
Let's look on the bright side with Mike Waters on 157 KOKZ.
Sponsored by Walton Collision Center.
So this is going on.
This went on in our neighbors at our neighbor's house, Nebraska.
But a Nebraska fifth grader, she's fifth grade, and she raised over $3,500 for her teacher, who is mourning the loss of her baby boy.
Can you imagine?
Adriana Case, this fifth grader, just feels so bad and wants to help in some kind of way.
And this is Karen Western Elementary School in Ralston, Nebraska.
But notice her teacher, Janice Rods, was just struggling to cope.
I mean, you got to feel.
You got to feel for struggling to cope with the health concerns of her five-month-old son, Caden.
So the baby was born with a heart defect and had spent most of his life in the hospital.
So Adriana gave Rods a blanket for her baby, but she wanted to do more.
So she asked her mom to help her start a crowdfund to help her teacher.
Now, sadly, baby Caden didn't make it and passed away on November 17th.
And the teacher says they think his heart was just overworking.
His heart was super, super fragile.
So now the money that Adriana was able to help raise for her teacher will go to help the family while they mourn the loss.
And Rods says that the fact that one of her students cared enough to do so much for her means far more than the money.
The thought is enough to give you a little bit of a bright side.
So she's very proud of Adriana.
And she says what she did to show her compassion and caring for others.
because she showed that for me.
I know she'd do that to other people.
So, I mean, what a great kid.
I mean, a great kid like that, of course, has to have great parents, but also great teachers.
Teachers can do amazing things.
So the fact that she felt that strongly about this teacher, and the teacher says she wouldn't have been able to get through the loss of Caden if it hadn't been for her students, and she plans to return to work this week.
oh it's just it's a heartbreaker but then you get this there's awesome bright side from one of her students and you can't help but feel a little a little brightness in your soul so there you go there is a bright side for a Monday morning sponsored by Wong Collision Center on highway 151 in Fairfax Wong Collision Center where quality is their priority now everybody sing
The
waters wake up
call with this morning's five things you didn't know you needed to hear.
All right, so starting off, if you are in search of a job, hey, New York City, New York City's not nearly as cool as Iowa.
But if you want to live and really hit the rat race, and I meant that literally, New York City needs a bloodthirsty rat czar.
The job pays $170,000 a year.
I don't know, I might, I might become a rat czar.
You know, they've got a big rodent problem, and I think they are always have, but the job listing says, the ideal candidate will have a background in project management and be, and I'm quoting here, bloodthirsty enough to deal with the quote, wholesale slaughter of rats.
Good luck to ya.
Alright, let's talk about this idiot.
Guess where he's from?
That's right, Florida.
Everybody got that right.
That's way to go.
Way to go.
Way to be quick on a Monday morning.
This guy in Florida arrested after trying to shoplift from a Walmart while the store was hosting a shop with a cop event, which included around 40 cops and a sheriff was there and, hey, you know what?
This will be a good chance for me to get in there and take some stuff and
Yeah, I got some drugs on me, but who cares?
Yeah, that's right.
He had drug paraphernalia on him at the time, too, including a meth pipe.
So it's unclear, you know, what he was trying to steal, but in addition to drugs, he had some Versace cologne on him.
Oh, drugs and Versace.
So they haven't said what charges he's facing.
What was wrong with this guy?
What is he on drugs?
Don't answer that.
Here is a little something when you may be suffering from IBS, not like the IBS that I do, because IBS every morning, but irritable bowel syndrome, and this is very surprising, by the way.
It may be triggered by gravity intolerance.
Yeah, I don't know.
I don't know, but that's what the experts are saying, and the idea is that our gut gets thrown out of whack if we can't manage the pull of gravity
And that can cause the same symptoms that we attribute to IBS.
Crazy, isn't it?
So, and they say, and this is the American Journal of Gastroenterology, they say, and I'm quoting, our body systems are constantly pulled downward.
If these systems cannot manage the drag of gravity, then it can cause issues.
Pain, cramping, like lightheadedness, sweating, rapid heartbeat, back issues, bacterial growth in the gut.
Hey, I have all of those.
But anyway, the same symptoms that we attribute to IBS.
And it does.
It affects like 10% of the world's population.
So check that out.
Check that out.
I've, you know, I read it, like I say, American Journal of Gastroenterology.
I think they know what they're talking about.
Alright, let's talk about this guy, and this goes right along with the dope who stole stuff after a shop with a cop event.
This guy complained to the cops when he didn't make their most wanted list.
Apparently this thief had such an ego.
He complained when he didn't make the most wanted list.
This was in Rockdale County, Georgia.
It was just east of Atlanta.
And they posted this top 10 list, and in the comments, some idiot who wasn't on the list wrote, How about me?
His name is Christopher Spalding.
It turned out he was wanted on two parole violations.
He didn't make the list because the charges weren't that serious.
Really?
But the sheriff's office replied, You're correct.
You have two warrants.
We are on the way.
So they posted a shot of him in custody on Thursday and thanked him for assisting in his own arrest.
Well, he's got the top 10 of idiot criminals like the shot with the cop guy.
After those idiot stories, here's a little something.
There was a school basketball game.
This kid, I mean, talk about a buzzer beater.
The kid is 13, Cooper Thorson, and he had an underarm full court shot to win the game for Milton Pope Elementary against the rival Marseille Elementary.
And both schools are in Marseille, Illinois.
And here's the audio of him making the shot.
And he has a little interview as well.
Listen.
When I shot it, I had no thought of it going in at all because it was from the other free throw line.
And then I just went in.
When I saw it go through the rim, I was like, no way.
I just went in.
We won.
And then I threw myself on the ground because it was just that crazy shot.
I just won the game versus that rival team, which made it a lot better.
Wow.
Isn't that, isn't that insane?
I think it's insane.
All right, and finally, you know, I saved this for the end because I don't know if you've ever been a Sesame Street fan.
I think we've all been fans of Sesame Street when it was still Susan and Gordon and Bob.
You remember Bob from Sesame Street?
From 1969 until 2016, he was on and he just passed away.
His name, Bob McGrath.
He was 90 years old.
He was on the show, like I say, first episode in 69 until 2016.
And here's what I remember about Bob from Sesame Street the most.
You know, I feel like meeting somebody around the neighborhood today.
How about it?
Oh, oh, who are the people in your neighborhood, in your neighborhood?
In your neighborhood, say who are the people in your neighborhood?
Well, they're the people that you meet when you're walking down the street.
They're the people that you meet each
day.
Rest in peace, Bob McGrath from Sesame Street.
And I think that's five things.
What were those things?
Five things you didn't know you needed to hear.
Thanks.
I needed that.
You know everything now.
That's five things no one else knows.
It's five things.
Thanks.
I needed that.
This is the water's wake-up call.
Thank you.
I needed to hear that.
